sorry if have you confused ,i always have trouble trying to explain things.
to me i forget about sharp focus for Bokeh, i concentrate pinpointing small area to be in softly in focus and bg out of focus .But just so i dont have you to baffled am sure its like everything everyone has there personal idea on what it is and pixalo accept what we class as bokeh and leave it up to members for deciding what is bokeh or not .so dont worry to much .some good pics on flicker relating to bokeh .good luck with the monthly comp