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Re: Lauren (not work safe)
Not the best pose for a top-heavy girl; I also find the line of her right arm to be distracting.
When your model has curves, they should be shown off - think of those shots of Sophie Dahl a few years back and you'll know what I mean. I also agree that the overall scene is a little 'off' too, since the colours are all from the same pallette and there's little variation... brown on brown with brown background doesn not work.
Try the same girl in a lighter setting to accentuate her red hair and full figure, and perhaps take along a few prints of Ms. Dahl at her best to communicate poses that should be attempted. I'd also think about a touch more directional lighting at either a 1:3 or 2:3 ratio to bring detail back where it has been lost in the shadows.
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