[Markulous]

Blimey, this is better than any novel:

"Whilst our hero battles sub-zero temperatures in the frozen north, Mr Ritz, lounging on his sundeck, dictated another baffling note via his secretary. Suspicions were beginning to mount that Mr Claus of North Pole fame might have snaffled the instamatic to make a record of how Global Warming was melting his winter palace. Watch this space for more developments..................."