[Dave]

12 of the finest double-entendres that have been aired on British TV & Radio

1. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'

2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'

3. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'

4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice.. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.'

5. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ..... Oh my god!! What have I just said??'

6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'

7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!

8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'

9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this.'

10. Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'

11. Michael Buerk on watching Phillipa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'

12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie F4nny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: 'Some weeks Nick likes to use F4nny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.

[Sonsey]

For goodness sake!

[silkstone]

And Brian Johnston commentating on an England v. WI Test Match...

"We welcome World Service listeners to the Oval, where the bowler's Holding, the batsman's Willey."

[Sparkymark]

A true story, that happened to me...was on a bus in Kingston upon Thames, and the driver got out of his little booth to swap with a chap who had just got on. The door to the booth closed and wouldn't re-open, and the two of them swore and cussed at it for a while whsil trying to force the lock. An attractive outdoors-y 40-something sitting at the front said "Do you want a screwdriver?" And one of the guys turned and said "That's very kind, love, but we're late enough already". The look on her face was priceless.